Does Your Child Hate Math?

Hating math often seems like the normal way for most kids, but should it really be that way? The reason most kids hate math is the same as why they hate anything; they aren't good at it! What if we could show almost any child how to conquer math? A lot would change indeed!

​I’d love to hear your comments or answer your questions.

Off to learn,

Fred Ray Lybrand

How the Procrastination Myth Hurts Kids

Having a misunderstanding about procrastination can easily create a lot of conflict and stress in parenting, especially in the day-to-day challenge of homeschooling. Identifying the issue and making a specially kind of LIST can help change everything for the better.

Video Transcription

Is the procrastination myth hurting your child? Well, I know we’re all concerned about things hurting our child but you may not even be aware that procrastination is really a myth and what I mean by that is there’s no such thing. Now, wait a minute, I know you can look it up in the dictionary and it says putting off something that you want to do or something like that; how it needs to be done. Well, everything could be considered procrastination that way whatever you’re not doing right now you’re watching this video and you’re not doing something else. Is that procrastination or is that a great use of your time?

I’ve got a son right now who is a sophomore in college and he wants to get married someday. Is he procrastinating marriage? And the answer is no.

He doesn’t want to get married. And you know, the funny thing about procrastination is that the problem is not putting off. The problem is motivation.

You don’t want to. Your child doesn’t want to. Let me tell you if you don’t mind me sharing this, I am still to this day, as a grown fellow, rumored and understood in my family among the remaining siblings that I’m... I’m the king of procrastination. I have all the kids growing up that never was doing what supposed to be doing. I was the procrastinator in the family. And yet as it turned out I’ve still been able and god’s kindness to get a lot done. Including successfully with my wife homeschooling five kids to college. I’ve got an earned doctorate and master’s degree and undergraduate degree. I spent sometime in law school of written. Eight or nine books. It’s tough, as a procrastinator. See, we’re all procrastinators, that’s why it’s a myth. We are all engaged in doing things we want to do and don’t want to do. That’s my story once I figured it out. I could stop being weird and guilty and inducing guilt and shame and problems on the kids.

So look, just be honest. What is it that you want? You want to do the things you wanna do. What is it that your child wants? He or she wants to do the things she wants to do.

That would not be a problem. As long as long the both of you wanted the exact things. And that’s why it hurts. There’s pain that comes from that. There is a conflict that comes from it and there’s a loss of energy. The amount of time you spend trying to get yourself to do something you don’t want to do. The amount of energy you try to spend getting a child to do something he or she doesn’t want to do is exhausting. That’s what you want. You want everybody to be doing what they want to do and what they want to do to be the right thing. So, the solution seems to be really obvious to me and it's not to give up. It’s not to say they should learn math if they don’t want to or they shouldn’t go to their youth group if they don’t want to or they shouldn’t be involved in physical activity if they don’t want to and they shouldn’t eat whatever they want to. I’m not saying that at all. I’m saying this, what you want to do is come up with more reasons why. For yourself, if you have something you really want to do in your fine hesitation. Spend some time on thinking through reasons why.

There’s more to it than that. But there’s so much leverage just there. Make a list of reasons why you want to do something. Don’t do your taxes? Why don’t you sit down and make a list of all the reasons you want to have your taxes completed and what it would mean positive to you. Your child doesn’t want to learn his math tables? Why don’t you work on thinking through all the reasons, it’s going to be great to do that. And some of them may have to do with his or her own time. And how once they learn them, they get to do something else. This is where some basic parental common sense come into play. Many times we give our children reasons to do things in the way of reward and consequences. Sometimes, they just need to know what we want but that’s the key.

Recognize it’s a myth is just about one two’s and then do the thing. Sit down and work out some clear reasons why you or they should want to do it. And you’ll see things change.

Off to learn,

Fred Ray Lybrand


Succeed in Homeschool the Lazy Way

Here I share why 'lazy' leads you in a better direction when combined with cleverness. Often homeschools are working too hard and getting too little accomplished. Learning to improve the Lazy Way is a game-changer.

Fred LybrandVideo Transcription

So, are you homeschooling the lazy way? Now, most people think homeschooling is the lazy way but that’s not quite right, in fact sadly homeschoolers often try to do as much as regular schools do which is crazy because they have all those teachers and all those resources, there’s no way to compete that way. What I want to offer you is that if you can grasp what I’m sharing about doing it the lazy way, your homeschool will be phenomenal. In fact I call this number one secret of the best home schools in the world when they grasp this issue.

Now let me just explain what the problem is first. The problem is your philosophy of homeschooling. It’s not how you set it up, it’s not actually the curriculum you have it etcetera. It’s the way you think about it because as a rule of thumb, it’s hard to think dumb and do smart and what you want to do is think smart about homeschool before you even set it up or as you re-calibrate it in the course of life. Because the problem we have is we’re overwhelmed. We’re so busy and so exhausted. We’re trying to do so much to get the kids ready for college and make sure that they know everything they need to do so people will understand that you’ve done at least as good as job as the school system and so you do the job for people.

Would it be okay if I just share with you a little of my story and that story is that we have five kids they’ve all been homeschooled from birth to college. Now my wife has a masters in Education and I have a doctoral degree along with some other degrees and none of that really matters because we had to unlearn some things in order to do what we did. Everyday for the bulk of our children’s homeschooling especially in later years combined, my wife and I would spend thirty minutes a day on homeschooling for all five children. Now they’ve all gone to college. They’ve all done phenomenally well! They all are doing phenomenally well academically and intellectually and I’m gonna tell you it’s because of the power of lazy that’s the solution.

I want to explain just really quickly, here is what lazy is all about in the dictionary it would say it’s unwilling to work or use energy, there you go. I’m unwilling to work or use energy at least more than I need to. I’m constantly wrestling with how can I do less effort and get better results; and that’s where it comes back to a philosophy because what happened and what you’ve got to decide is are you going to be someone who teaches your children to get them prepared or you’re gonna be someone who facilitates then learning how to teach themselves. We were lazy, when you combine lazy and clever you get creative and that’s what I’m suggesting that when you take an approach that says this kids can teach themselves: and we want them to learn how to be self-taught then the entire system is designed to encourage them to wrestle with their math and wrestle with the reading and wrestle with their writing and then give them facilitation tools and they need to get better and better because they’ve learned it themselves and then they’re ready for the rest of their lives; whenever a job in or something new happens they just teach themselves the new jobs. And that’s what our kids do and that’s what I love your kids to do and it’s all about the power of lazy. You gotta start with not wanting to exhaust yourself but to be clever in it. If you look on this page you’re gonna see a link and you get about two hours of us just walking through how we homeschool and it’s free; it’s for you. We certainly have things we offer but we want to do more than anything is to create an army of lazy, clever homeschool moms and dads who were saying and put kids out there who can make a really big difference in this world.

Off to learn,

Fred Ray Lybrand

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